Bitter, bitter chocolate....

It must not be like this, to know and try so hard not to hurt.
It should not be like this, to know and hurt so hard.
It should not be like this, to not know, then to know and yet hurt, hurt, hurt.
This is not how stories should end: that special taste, that smooth sensation of the purest truth spreading on the tongue; quickly rushing from behind to smother this sweetness, acridity.
Bitter, bitter chocolate.

At times like these I feel completely inadequate and certain that I wasn't ever meant to be an engineer. I am a student at IIT, purpotedly part of the "cream" of the nation. And I don't quite think I can deal with it.
People at office (the technical guys) have taken to springing techie questions at me each and every time they see me. And I am not good at this. People can't expect to give me a cpl of totally unrelated (or so they seem to be at the time :D) figures and come up with a totally complete answer. These are the times when I wish with all my heart I had listened to my mum and quietly done my Bcom at Hyd (her reasons were different, she didn't want me to go to some far-flung place, she'd miss all the shopping and fun that we have all the while, the poor dear!). Hell, I thought the Professors at IIT had mastered the art of making students feel totally worthless and inadequate, looks like they have competition...
I am simply not the type of person who can take two random figures, fish (succesfully at that) through "all" the knowledge their cabbage-sized brains have amassed, and come up with a meaningful answer. And I am supposed to be intelligent and smart. HA!
Next time around I shall show the guy my tongue and prance away into the distance.

Complacency: The feeling you have when you are satisfied with yourself.
Syn: Satisfaction, contentment, smugness**
I feel smug and complacent. I know I shouldn't be admitting this, knowing as I do that Murphy might...nay...Will be listening, but yet..:D
*muffled YIPPEEEEEEEEE!!!!* (both coz I am in office and coz I am attempting to thwart Murphy from discovering and thereby disrupting my smugness...)

**Definition from Websters online dictionary

Some people are so obnoxious it surprises me that no one has murdered them yet. In any given situation, at any given time, it is essential that at least two obnoxious people exist in the immediate surroundings. And their primary functions seem to be
1. To try to outwit each other in disgusting everyone else around
2. To disgust everyone else around
3. To actually try and subtly dissect the other person’s obnoxiousness well within hearing range of the aforesaid person
4. To be royal smart arses with no such actual reasons for these claims

What is amusing is that there are always the nice-joker-types who make sure their disgust is well concealed behind a façade of humor directed at the smart arses. And all these clashes, I must say, make extremely interesting viewing, or, as the case may be, listening (that particular case is when you are a trainee and a girl at that, thereby expected to be demure and silent and we-ll, working incessantly). Incidentally, none of which I happen to be....
And whoever said office gossip was fast disappearing can, well, eat their hats or whatever headgear they adorn themselves with. In the absence of headgear, plastic flowers will do. That because there is an irritatingly large number of the aforesaid in what some interior decorator must have thought of as “strategic locations to minimize stress amongst the staff” in despicable colors around here.
At times like these I am fairly sure that someone is out to kill me with an artful new technique. Horrendous color clashes.

"Hey,
The amazing turn on looks make me invite you as a Friend and the
appealing profile makes it more interesting..... Making the world go
bedazzled...... n atlast u r having such a Nice hairs.. Friendz?"

How does anyone react to this?! Apart from the appaling lack of grammatical sense, how do these guys have the audacity to think anything as preposterous as a corny line like that will work on anyone??!! (not to mention, girls :D) This Orkut thing is all very fine to keep in touch with people whom you are not exactly inclined to mail, but what about all these chaps?? What are they thinking anyway?! I would really want to know...Hell, it'd probably make an interesting research topic!

"u r havin such a nice hairs"?!?!?!?! He gives me the idea he thinks each hair has an individual personality that can be classified as "nice"...and that, incidentally, is a very creepy thought...!

Sometimes I wonder if I have inadvertently stuck a board on my forehead saying “come, screw with me”…or maybe it was Murphy who did it …
I have unbelievably bad luck….
Why else would an auto that seems perfectly fine breakdown at the worst possible point?? Bang on top of a large flyover, i.e. And since it wasn’t too far (in terms of distance covered by powered vehicles alone) away from my destination (a mild term for something as drastic as office), I couldn’t get another auto to take me. And so I had to walk. I had to freakin walk all the way in that disgusting heat (yes, disgusting is the perfect adjective for it. It induces disgust in all living creatures in a way I wouldn’t deem possible) to office.
If you think you know of anyone with worse luck, beat that.

(Ohhh and just in case you think you can beat me with one little story of miserable luck, you definitely wouldn't want to hear of all the times...)