Some people are so obnoxious it surprises me that no one has murdered them yet. In any given situation, at any given time, it is essential that at least two obnoxious people exist in the immediate surroundings. And their primary functions seem to be
1. To try to outwit each other in disgusting everyone else around
2. To disgust everyone else around
3. To actually try and subtly dissect the other person’s obnoxiousness well within hearing range of the aforesaid person
4. To be royal smart arses with no such actual reasons for these claims

What is amusing is that there are always the nice-joker-types who make sure their disgust is well concealed behind a façade of humor directed at the smart arses. And all these clashes, I must say, make extremely interesting viewing, or, as the case may be, listening (that particular case is when you are a trainee and a girl at that, thereby expected to be demure and silent and we-ll, working incessantly). Incidentally, none of which I happen to be....
And whoever said office gossip was fast disappearing can, well, eat their hats or whatever headgear they adorn themselves with. In the absence of headgear, plastic flowers will do. That because there is an irritatingly large number of the aforesaid in what some interior decorator must have thought of as “strategic locations to minimize stress amongst the staff” in despicable colors around here.
At times like these I am fairly sure that someone is out to kill me with an artful new technique. Horrendous color clashes.